The Collar
by Kaerith
Summary: The Zell Turns Into a Kitten, Changes Back, And Then He and Raijin Fall In Lurrve crack!fic that became something more. language, yaoi
1. The Premise

The Premise

"Okay. Stand like this. Nina, your stance is off-balance." Zell corrected a black-haired cadet that was even shorter than he was, and made sure the rest of his martial arts students were following his example. "Now, assailants, try the fifth hold." The cadets in the second line grabbed the wrists of their partners who were standing before them. Yuki's hands wrapped around Zell's arms.

"Drop your shoulder, bend your knees, and twist!" Though he was expecting to be thrown, Yuki sailed past the instructor, barely managing to stay on the mat as he landed.

"Oops," Zell said, grinning sheepishly. "Forget my strength sometimes."

The class tittered. Zell stepped over and offered a hand to his volunteer. Once Yuki was on his feet, the spiky-haired blond turned to the class and had them try the maneuver one pair at a time.

Half an hour later class was dismissed and Zell headed to the cafeteria. As he passed Seifer Almasy in the hall, the larger man grin evilly and shoved Zell into a potted palm. The pot shattered and the tree tipped. Zell scrambled to his feet and tried to right the palm. Zell could barely hear Almasy's taunt of "Watch where you're going, Chickie" over the enraged pounding in his ears.

"I hate you!" Zell yelled after him. Seifer acknowledged his sentiment with a casual wave over his shoulder and continued talking to his DC posse.

Suddenly not in the mood to brave the lunch rush in the cafeteria, the blond decided to pound a few 'Rexaurs into dog chow.

By the time his anger had cooled, Zell was hot and tired. He was thankful that he had still been wearing his loose training clothes from class, but the new choker he'd picked up in Timber a few days prior was sticking uncomfortably to his neck. He removed it and wiped the leather with his shirt.

It was awesome. Slick black leather that had rainbow highlights when the light hit it the right way. It reminded him of the puddles of oil he'd seen at garages. Zell had already received several compliments in the three days that he'd been wearing it, and simply answered "Timber" whenever anyone asked where he had got it, purposely neglecting to mention that he'd bought it from a pet store.

The blond was both grateful and annoyed at the remarks he'd gotten. He'd secretly been hoping that maybe the collar would hint at the message that Zell was gay (he'd been open about it for years, he'd just had depressingly little action) and that he was more than willing to be a bottom for some nice, hot guy. Sadly, he hadn't gotten any more propositions in the past three days than he'd gotten in the last five months: zilch.

Despite the fact that it was mostly girls who asked about his new accessory, Zell was happy to get a little attention. Now that he and all his friends were instructors, the whole gang was too busy to hang out often. He was feeling lonely and unappreciated.

Pulling himself out of his unhappy thoughts, Zell latched the collar around his neck again and started back through the foliage to the entrance to the Training Center. He was exhausted; he hadn't been sleeping well and his impromptu workout had stretched a little too long. His limbs were shaky and heavy, and he knew he'd have to sit for a while before making his way to his dorm.

Unfortunately, his path was abruptly blocked by two T-Rexaurs.

"Shit," he muttered. He knew he was way too tired to deal with this with his fists.

Quetzalcoatl ended up killing the two reptiles, taking a surprising amount of damage in the process. Zell had been so drained that his summonings took longer than usual.

Reluctantly deciding that he needed a little boost to manage to trudge back home, he searched his pockets for any useful items. All he found were potion+s and a Pet House. Shrugging, he used the latter, figuring that Quetz could use some healing anyway.

Everything turned black.


	2. The Finding

The Finding

Zell opened his eyes to find that he was lying in the greenery of the Training Center. Had he been KO'd? Or had he simply passed out?

He shook his head, trying to clear his spotty vision. He didn't remember being attacked. Warily, and wearily, he pushed himself to his feet. All four of them.

Through the fog in his mind, Zell could tell something was wrong. Four feet?

His butt felt funny and he managed to turn his head to see marmalade-colored fluff and a tail.

_What the hell?_ he tried to say, but his voice didn't work. All that emerged was a reedy, frightened mew. Shock and disbelief slammed into Zell's mind. Why the fuck was he a _cat_?!

Startled, Zell's new pointed and furry ears swiveled at a sound. Mentally, he groaned when he recognized the voice that permeated through the leaves. Unconsciously, he sunk to the ground and his ears flattened in fear. He was torn- which was more dangerous? Drawing his tormentor's attention or remaining lost and defenseless in the Training Center?

Ultimately, his frozen body made the decision for him. He was still immobile when Seifer and his two cronies crashed into the clearing. "Wha'd I tell ya, Raij? Garden'll never put different monsters in here."

The large, dark man caught sight of Zell and stopped. "Maybe they did, ya know?" He said, pointing directly at the crouched cat.

The blond barely spared a glance at the tiny animal before resuming his scanning for 'Rexaurs. "That ain't what I was taking 'bout, you goon."

"KITTEN?" Fujin stated in surprise.

"Wonder how it got here, ya know?" The giant mused as he slowly approached Zell. The martial artist could feel the hairs on his tail bristle out of fright. Raijin had always scared him more than Seifer ever had. The somewhat thick man had never overtly threatened Zell; indeed, Zell couldn't remember a time when the DC member had ever spoken directly to him. He just had a menacing air around him.

Zell's new body, however, disagreed with his thoughts. When Raijin squatted a few feet away and cooed "Here, kitty kitty", Zell found himself creeping forward. He cautiously approached the man's outstretched hand with its waggling fingers and sniffed. Some part of his new feline brain must have found some favorable scent because, to Zell's inner horror, his tongue extended to give a huge thumb a tentative lick.

The large man's crooning words washed over Zell. The Balambite was consumed with mortification. His attention snapped back to his situation when he felt himself being picked up.

A pathetic mew came from Zell as he was dangled high above the ground. An instant later he was being tucked into the crook of a beefy arm and pressed against a broad chest. "There, there," the voice rumbled, "You're okay." Thick fingers scratched gently behind Zell's ears and he found himself leaning into the touch. "Good kitty."

Raijin's tender moment was ended by matching snorts from his two friends. He looked up into three eyes that held mixtures of disbelief, surprise, and slight scorn.

"Didn't know you were a cat person, Rai," Seifer drawled, lips stretching into a grin tinged with mockery.

"CUTE," the woman said, rolling her one red eye.

Raijin found himself frowning. "What? Poor thing was alone and scared, ya know?"

"You planning on keepin' the pathetic thing?" Almasy inquired. Zell flattened himself against the staff fighter as the ex-Knight strolled close.

"Yes," Raijin stated calmly. Zell felt anything but calm as Seifer poked a finger at him. He hissed at the blond and showed his teeth. "Don't seem to like ya, Seif," the dark man observed. "I'm gonna take him back to my room, ya know." Carefully cradling the kitten, he turned and began walking toward the exit.

"Hey, Fuu. Looks like Raijin's got himself a new best friend." Seifer snickered.

Zell barely heard the comment. He was being stroked around his ears again and that seemed far more important.

Dazed, Zell paid no attention to where Raijin was taking him. When the man stopped moving they were in a dorm room.

Zell had never wondered about what Seifer's male sidekick's room looked like; even if he had, his guesses would have been completely wrong.

All the standard SeeD furnishings were present, of course. The bed had a navy blue comforter and the desk was cluttered with what appeared to be a pile of rocks. There weren't any books, just a few short stacks of vid-discs and empty beverage cans on the floor by the vidscreen. A framed photograph of a frail-looking old woman sat on a shelf surrounded by a couple loops of beads and magazines. There was one poster on the wall: an amateur's painting of the sun setting over a forested valley ringed with mountains.

"Here ya go." Raijin's deep voice rumbled and Zell was placed gently on the bed. The man stepped back and watched as the kitten seemed to scrutinize its surroundings.

Zell was tired. He felt all four legs begin to tremble as he looked around the room. Well, he mused, he may as well give in to this new body's demands. He obviously wasn't in good enough condition to escape, and Raijin seemed to be okay. Not much he could do anyway if the muscled man decided to eat him or something. And the cat side of him seemed content.

It was a cute little thing, Raijin noted. Probably only a few weeks old. He wondered briefly how the tiny animal had ended up alone in the Training Center. Were there others? Had a cadet's contraband pet wandered off to have her litter? Raijin promised himself that he would go back and look after this one had settled in. Which probably wouldn't be much longer, as he (a peek under the tail had determined that the cat was a tom) yawned.

Apparently deciding that Raijin's room was safe, the kitten curled up into splotchy cream and yellow ball. His nose was tucked in his fur and his eyes closed, so he didn't witness a rare and tender smile from the human.


	3. The First Three Days

The First Three Days

Zell was awakened from his doze by someone stroking his back. It felt _good_, and he mindlessly rolled onto his back to get his tummy rubbed with a petulant mew.

An amused chuckle made his brain snap to awareness. The face of Seifer Almasy's menacing shadow loomed over him.

"Don't need to be scared, ya know," Raijin assured him. "I'm not gonna hurt you. I like cats."

Zell's eyes narrowed in suspicion, but he didn't do more than squirm back on to his belly.

"My Gran has cats. I went to live with her after my mother died, ya know. That's her." The dark man pointed at the picture of the old woman that Zell had noticed earlier. Raijin's thick index finger then directed the cat's attention to the sunset painting on the wall. "Mommy painted that picture."

If the large staff-fighter's voice hadn't seemed so vulnerable and sad, Zell would have laughed out loud (as much as a kitten can, anyways) at the hulking muscleman calling his mother "mommy." But Zell was realizing that there was something childlike and touching about Raijin. Certainly, no one could claim that he was a genius, but the man's lack of intelligence didn't mean he was stupid and ignorant. After all, it takes a large amount of intuition and discipline to become a fighter of SeeD caliber. Perhaps Raijin wasn't book- or street smart, but Zell was beginning to suspect that he had other just as admirable gifts and strengths.

Raijin's muted demeanor was abruptly replaced by excitement. "Oh, I remember!" He practically leapt off the bed and ran to the desk. Zell watched as the man opened a brown box. "Gran sent me a package! I told her about you, ya know, and she sent these for you." He pulled out a bag and poured some of the contents into a beefy hand. "Liver treats!"

A huge palm was thrust before Zell's face. He sniffed at the brown lumps. They did smell good. He tentatively nibbled at one. Yummy!

Raijin chuckled gently as the kitten's nose dove into the small pile of treats. It didn't take long for the marmalade cat to eat them all. Zell then curled up, happy and sated.

--

The next time Zell regained full awareness, he was sprawled across Raijin's lap. The man held a magazine in one hand and stroked Zell's fur with the other. It felt good. Zell heard himself purring. Dimly, his mind noted that he should be mortified and should leap up and get away; after all, that's what he would have automatically done just yesterday. But he had no inclination to.

--

After getting a concerned look from his keeper earlier in the afternoon and a remark about how he didn't seem to be a clean cat, Zell was grudgingly giving himself a tongue bath on the carpet. The human part of his mind found it a stupid and demeaning task, especially when he had to contort to lick himself in places that, ironically, he would've loved to be able to lick as a human. Just not with an audience.

Raijin had returned reeking of sweat and had just finished showering. Zell watched with half-closed eyes as the man put in a vid-disc and settled himself on the bed. A moment later, his blue eyes widened comically.

Raijin was watching porn!

…Not just any old kind of porn: _gay_ porn! And this particular vid happened to be one of _Zell's_ current favorites: a short sexy guy (that Zell thought he rather resembled) and a taller and muscular guy whose wresting match turned into snogging and then into a shameless fuck fest.

Being in a cat body didn't prevent Zell from feeling horny when he recognized his favorite vid; but thankfully being in a _kitten_ body ensured that his male cat parts didn't show his excitement. Zell really didn't want Raijin to see him with a hard on no matter what kind of body he was living in.

The man moaned suddenly and Zell's head whipped around. Hyne! Raijin was sitting there stroking his meat! A strangled sound emerged from Zell's throat but the dark man was too lost in what he was doing to notice.

His own orientation being what it was, Zell had to admit to himself that Raijin was well hung with a long, thick, and beautiful cock. The kind he would very much enjoy if the man it was attached to wasn't so repellent. But this was Seifer Almasy's dumb, hulking, brutish, menacing ogre of a sidekick he was looking at, he reminded himself. A lackey that had stood by whenever the ex-Knight taunted, teased, or humiliated Zell. If being the blond's friend wasn't in itself a motive to hate the guy, then his silent approval of Seifer's torment definitely was, in Zell's book.

Annoyed that Raijin had the gall to… to_ carry on_ in this manner in front of a cat, Zell trotted into the bathroom in a huff. He felt like exacting some petty revenge. After jumping up on the sink he peed on Raijin's bar of facial soap. He could feel his lips stretching into as much of an evil grin that a cat's mouth could manage.

_There!_ He thought in satisfaction.


	4. The Fourth Day

The Fourth Day

Zell's fourth day as a cat began badly.

Seifer and Fujin sauntered into the dorm room at six-thirty, waking both Zell and Raijin. If it had been up to Zell, he would have given the annoying bully some hisses and several deep scratches for barging in uninvited this early, but Raijin just yawned and greeted them as if it was no big deal.

"Something goin' on today?" Raijin inquired.

"We're going chicken hunting," Seifer declared.

Fujin rolled her eye and whacked the blond on the head. "OBSESSED."

"Chicken hunting?" The third DC member asked cluelessly.

"Yup. Seems like Zell's been avoiding us. I even asked around. Apparently, no one's seen your boyfriend for a few days."

_Boyfriend?_ Zell's sleepy mind picked up on the fact that Almasy was missing his favorite victim, but didn't understand the abrupt transition to the topic of Raijin's missing lover. Of course, the implication that Raijin was gay was hardly a revelation after what had happened last night, but the martial artist had never heard any rumors that Raijin had a lover.

"Zell's not my boyfriend, ya know," the muscled man murmured shyly. Zell would've sworn that Raijin was blushing behind his swarthy complexion.

_Is there another SeeD or cadet named Zell?_ He wondered. He didn't recall hearing anything about that.

"Don't know what you even see in that Chicken-wuss anyway," Seifer muttered.

Things clicked. Zell blinked. WTF? Raijin was interested in _him_??

Raijin frowned at that comment. "He's sweet. I hate it when you pick on him, ya know?"

Zell must have made a noise, because all three giant faces turned to stare at him. He nearly panicked, but the petting by a large tanned hand calmed him. _Sweet? _Sweet_**?!**__ I may be _nice_, but I'm definitely __**not**__ sweet!_ Despite the stares he was getting, he huffed angrily. _Raijin is a moron._

"You still have that stupid cat?" Seifer asked.

"Zell isn't stupid, ya know!" Raijin retorted. Zell's ears twitched in alarm. There was no way that he could know it was him!

"ZELL?" The albino asked with a snigger. Seifer chuckled at Raijin's expense too.

"You named the cat Zell?" The ex-Knight elbowed the woman next to him. "You said that _I'm_ the one obsessed?" They both laughed.

"…Shut up," Raijin protested quietly. The two SeeDs ignored him.

His weak reply affecting some part of his conscience, Zell looked at the man. The big guy's chin was tucked to his chest and he looked almost miserable.

Still laughing, the visitors left the room with a "See ya," from Seifer as an afterthought. Raijin didn't move.

Zell stood up and walked into Raijin's range of vision. "Mrow?" He asked, confused and concerned. The man sighed and raised both hands to stroke him.

"Good kitty. I'm okay. They're just assholes, ya know?"

Raijin didn't look any happier, so Zell butted his head against his chin. "They make fun of me sometimes, but they're the only friends I've got, ya know. They found out that I have a crush on the guy that Seif likes to pick on and they tease me about it sometimes."

This new information did not mesh with the conception of the trio's relationship that Zell had always had. Could it be that Seifer and Fujin were strong-willed pricks and Raijin had just gone along with them because he didn't have anyone else? Could this intimidatingly brawny staff fighter be naturally gentle and kind and sensitive? As Raijin's fingers scratched the itchy spots behind his ears, Zell mulled this hypothesis over. He did have to admit that he couldn't recall Raijin ever instigating anything. And the man usually just stood back and stayed out of the conflicts unless either one of his "friends" prodded him into joining in.

Zell's eyelids were falling shut from the attention and the purr was rumbling loudly.

"I decided to name you Zell," Raijin declared. "That's the name of the guy I like, ya know. Your eyes look a lot like his." Zell was both fascinated and reluctant to hear about Raijin's crush on him.

Large brown eyes looked into nowhere. "He's a martial artist. Blond hair and blue eyes, ya know? He's short, but he's strong. An' even though Seif scares him, Zell never backs down." The amount of respect on Raijin's face was humbling. All Zell could do was just stare and listen. "He's brave. He helped Squall fight the Sorceress. An' he's smart. Knows a lot about history and electronics. He was the one that figured out the power system in the basement levels, ya know." Pride as well as admiration was in his voice.

Raijin's mind returned to the here and now and his gaze dropped back to Zell's. "And, ya know, he's really cute." His self-depreciating laugh was almost a shy giggle.

Since it didn't seem like Raijin was going to stop petting him soon, Zell curled up in the man's lap. He felt stupefied. All his whining to himself about not being noticed, and here was a guy who seemed to put him on a pedestal. Why didn't the man ever make a move? Given Zell a _hint_? He was dying to ask. "Mao," he said instead.

"Good kitty," Raijin repeated absentmindedly, lost again in his thoughts. "I know Zell probably hates me 'cause I hang out with Seif, ya know, but maybe… maybe next time I see him I should try to talk to him."

"Mrrr," Zell agreed. _Though who knows when or if I'll be human again._ He certainly hadn't made much progress in figuring out what happened or getting anyone to believe that he wasn't a real cat.

Raijin seemed to recall something because he suddenly frowned. "I wonder if he's really missing?"

_Yes_! Zell thought. _If I can get Raijin to investigate this, maybe he'll find clues that'll make him figure out that I've been changed!_

"Meow!" He demanded. He jumped off the bed and sat by the door.

Raijin gave him a weird look. "Are you telling me to go and find him?"

Zell tried nodding his head but it didn't work. "Me-_ow_!"

"You are a strange kitty. Sometimes it seems like you understand what's going on, ya know?"

Zell purred. The man looked startled. "Okay. We'll go. I'm gonna get dressed first."

--

Once they were walking the crowded halls, Zell permitted the indignity of being carried. It was certainly more appealing than being trampled to death.

The first place Raijin decided to visit was the Headmistress' office. Quistis was surprised but welcomed him warmly. Zell could tell, however, that she was put off balance by the unusual visitor.

"Where did you get the kitten?" She asked. Zell silently laughed; if it had been any other cadet or SeeD, ol' Quisty would've come right out with a "Pets are not permitted in Garden!" Seemed like the huge man intimidated her, too.

"In the Training Center, ya know."

The blond woman frowned. "How did it get there, I wonder? Well, anyway, what can I assist you with?" She moved behind her desk and sat down, gesturing for Raijin to take a seat as well.

"Um, well, Seifer Almasy mentioned that Zell Dincht has been missing."

Her eyes narrowed. "Pardon me, but I wish to know your motives in asking this question. Why are you looking for Zell?"

Raijin fidgeted. "It's nothing bad. I just wanted to talk to him, ya know?"

For a second, Quistis looked lost. She resumed her in-control and capable attitude quickly. "I know you do not usually participate in the bullying that Seifer and, to a lesser extent, Fujin engage in, but why should I tell you anything about Zell?"

The man couldn't think of an answer, except admitting his attraction, and he didn't really want to blurt that out to this whip-wielding demon lady. Zell picked up on his fear of Quistis and felt smug; she was definitely a good person to have on your side.

…Well, except when she was refusing to give out any information to the one guy who had the chance to figure out that you were a cat. Zell found himself getting annoyed at Quisty.

The Garden Headmistress waited for exactly two minutes for Raijin's response. Not getting one, she got to her feet. "If you cannot give me a reason, I'm afraid I can not tell you anything about Zell Dincht's whereabouts."

Zell glanced up at Raijin and saw that the man had a stricken expression. "B-but…"

_Hyne_, Zell thought. The man _was_ a bit lacking in the intelligence department. He couldn't even make up a lie about a mission or needing Zell's skills for a problem or something.

Zell's reasoning for Raijin's silence changed greatly with what the man said next. "I… I don't wanna lie, Miss Trepe. But I'm embarrassed about the truth."

Quistis was also surprised. Her eyebrows shot up toward her hairline and she sat down again.

"Is it a personal thing, Raijin?"

The man nodded, keeping his gaze safely on the kitten in his lap.

"But it is not anything bad for Zell?"

Raijin thought then shook his head.

Quistis seemed to stifle a sigh. "Zell seems to have disappeared four days ago. After teaching his class, he was last seen at the Training Center."

Raijin looked up worriedly. "The Training Center?!"

The headmistress nodded. "But there have been no signs that he was eaten by a T-Rexaur. I've had SeeDs trying to draw the GF he had junctioned from the monsters in case that had happened, but Quetzalcoatl has not turned up." The staff fighter's expression didn't change, so she elaborated, "That is a good thing."

"Miss Trepe, I want to help look for him, ya know," Raijin demanded.

Quistis shrugged. "Honestly, we've hit a dead end. We've asked his mother and friends, and no one has any idea where he's gone."

"But still," the man stated, refusing to be denied.

"Then I suggest you take a look around the Training Center where he was last seen."

"Okay!" The man stood up quickly, thankfully snatching up Zell before he fell on the floor. "Thank you very much, Headmistress," Raijin said politely before he turned and half-ran from the room.

Quistis was both amused and confused. Did Zell have a relationship with Raijin? It seemed highly unlikely; the few times he was seen around Garden, Raijin was always with the rest of the Disciplinary Committee. As far as she knew, the large man never talked to anyone else. She had always suspected that he was shy, but had been unwilling to believe that hunch until today, when she had actually talked with him.

Raijin actually seemed to be quiet and calm and even rather innocent. Maybe it was simply his somewhat low IQ, but now Quistis now preferred to think that Raijin was more tenderhearted and moral than his friends.

--

Raijin practically ran to the Training Center, something that Zell thought was quite amusing since getting there a few minutes quicker would hardly have an effect on his disappearance.

He stopped just outside the first gate. "I shouldn't bring you in there. It's dangerous." He started to put Zell on a bench, but the kitten mewed pathetically. Zell needed to go with him; he would lead Raijin to the spot where he'd transformed.

Raijin almost looked persuaded, but managed to stick to his decision. "No. You are staying here." He set Zell down. The cat looked around then bolted through a gap in the fence.

"Zell!" Raijin cried. He ran after the defenseless kitty.

Zell had equipped Quetzalcoatl with the No Encounter skill, and he was able to activate it even as a cat. He made sure that Raijin stayed within the range of the effect yet kept himself just out of the man's reach. He stopped in the clearing where he'd last been human.

"Bad kitty!" Raijin scooped him up and swatted him on his butt. Zell would've blushed if he wasn't a cat, but all he could do instead was squirm and mew. He was clutched protectively against the man's hard chest. "This is a dangerous place. You could've been killed, ya know!"

The man really seemed to be distressed. Zell felt a stab of guilt and licked the man's wrist in apology.

"Hey," Raijin said, realizing where they were. "This is where I found you!"

Zell squirmed, indicating that he wanted to be put down. Amazingly, Raijin allowed it, with a cautioning, "Don't wander off, ya know."

The cat trotted to where he thought he'd been standing when he'd used the Pet House and nosed around the tall grass.

His collar! It was lying in a thick patch of weeds hidden in a shadow. Zell meowed in triumph and ran over to nudge it with his nose.

"What did you fiind?" Raijin carefully stepped through the grass and gasped when he saw the accessory. "That's Zell's!" He reached down, picked it up, and reverently stroked it with his fingertips. Zell meowed to get Raijin's attention, sitting where the collar had been.

"How did you know-" The man cut himself off and his mind seemed to make an intuitive leap in logic. "You- you're not Zell are you?"

Zell purred ecstatically and had to jump up and dance around in relief.

The man dropped to his knees next to the cat. The look in his eyes caught Zell's attention and he stilled.

"Zell?" The man whispered.

Zell purred and rubbed his head against Raijin's knee.

"What's three minus one?"

Zell cocked his head. What the hell did that have to do with anything? But he obediently meowed twice. "And who is Seifer?" Raijin asked. Zell hissed. Inside he was laughing at the simple fact that they were having a conversation of sorts.

Raijin sat back on his heels and covered his face with his hands. "Oh Hyne…."

Zell was concerned. "Mrrow?"

"'Mbarrassed, ya know," the man mumbled.

Well, so was Zell. He'd listened to Raijin explain his attraction for him, seen him masturbate over a similar-looking guy in a porno flick, and now people would know that he had somehow managed to turn himself into a damn kitten!

Zell wondered how to convince Raijin that everything was okay, for now at least. He climbed onto the man's legs and bumped his head against his elbow. One hand lowered to reveal one brown eye. "Meow."

Raijin actually sniffled a little bit. Had he been _crying_? Zell wondered. Once again, the genuine and gentle personality that Raijin seemed to have hidden under his menacing exterior stirred something in Zell. He'd learned since this morning that Raijin was someone that he wanted to get to know, maybe even help out, since he appeared to be a fellow victim of Seifer Almasy.

"Should we go tell Miss Trepe?" Raijin inquired. Zell meowed in confirmation.

Neither of them moved. Raijin finally ventured, "Can you please get off my legs?" Zell acquiesced but stood in place as the man walked a couple paces away and looked back. "You coming?"

Zell was very tired. Apparently, he'd danced around a little too much or something. Unfortunately, kittens didn't appear to have much stamina. His jaw opened in a huge yawn.

"You… want me to carry you?"

"Mew." _Yes._ Zell's eyes began to close as Raijin picked him up, but he recalled something important and struggled in the man's grip.

"What is it?" Raijin placed him gently back on the ground and Zell sleepily staggered forward about two foot and nosed a small bottle hidden in the grass. The staff fighter collected Zell and the Pet House vial and collar, as Zell himself yawned again and fell asleep.

--

He must have been sleeping very deeply, for when he woke up he was alone in Raijin's room. The man had left a short note next to him explaining that he was talking to Quistis. Zell felt a strange mixture of amusement and pity as he studied Raijin's handwriting: childish and blocky printed letters scribed in pencil.

Zell stretched. Then, sighting the full water dish and bowl of liver treats, he felt a wave of appreciation for Raijin and dug in.

When the door opened, Zell ignored it and continued eating, expecting Raijin. He was literally pulled away from his food when someone lifted him by the back of the neck. He hissed and squirmed.

"Hey Zell." Fear hit him and Zell stopped struggling. He was swung around to look right into Seifer's face.

_He thinks I'm a cat_, Zell reminded himself, and he started meowing pathetically.

"You can stop that, chickie. I know it's you." Seifer looked vastly amused at the situation. "I would have thought you'd change into a chicken. But I must admit you make an awfully cute little kitty."

Zell stopped moving completely and just hung limp in his enemy's grip. He was defenseless: four pairs of claws and a mouthful of tiny teeth were hardly any match for Seifer; and with his pathetically low HP of 25, all Seifer needed to do to KO him was poke him once with a stick.

Almasy smirked. "Quite the opportunity for me. You are in no condition to fight back now. …But what shall I do with you?"

Zell did his best to glare at his tormentor while expectantly glancing at the door.

Seifer noticed his looks and laughed. "Your hero is not going to come and save you. Fujin's got him distracted." Zell's hopes were dashed. "But don't worry little Zell-Kitty; I won't play with you _too_ hard." The man's chuckles grew ominously louder. "I ain't plannin' on hurting ya any."

The torture went on for almost an hour. Seifer hadn't lied—none of his pranks actually _harmed_ Zell. By the time the fifth frilly doll dress with matching hat had been forced onto Zell's body for the benefit of Seifer's camera, he was praying for death or the pain of a broken bone; _something_ to keep his thoughts off of the humiliation.

--

Seifer dropped Zell off back at Raijin's room. The staff fighter's frantic pacing was interrupted by their entrance.

"What did you do to him?!" The dark man was worried and enraged enough to forego his usual addendum of "ya know."

Almasy casually dropped the kitten onto Raijin's bed. "Nothing. We just enjoyed a little play time. I'll give you a copy of the photos when they're developed." The blond smirked smugly and left the room.

Raijin scooped Zell off the bedspread. "Did he hurt you?" Zell meowed in the negative, but his ears were still flattened in shame and he avoided making eye contact. "Whatever happened, it wasn't your fault, ya know?" The big man soothed, "You couldn't have done anything."

Zell reluctantly ceded the point. _But I was stupid and unlucky enough to get myself into this situation in the first place,_ he thought glumly.

"I told Miss Trepe. She didn't believe me, ya know."

Zell felt despair tighten its hold around his chest. He wanted to hiss, but didn't have the energy to fight through the cocoon of depression.

"I was going to take you back to see her, ya know. But now it's too late and she's prob'ly left her office and is down in her apartment. And I don't know where that is, ya know?"

Zell just slumped even more bonelessly against the corded forearm that was holding him up.

The gentle stroking and scratching stopped abruptly and a thick finger poked Zell's side. This jolted Kitten Zell out of his funk, and he turned to face Raijin's ginormous head and give him a narrow-eyed glare. _Hey! I was enjoying my well-deserved little pity party here!_ Zell thought indignantly.

The man's face didn't register any contrition. Raijin's half-frown was more distracted than annoyed. "Wait. You know where she lives, right? You can take me there and we'll convince her, ya know!"

Meanly, Zell attributed the delay in the man's realization to his dim-witted mind, and mentally rolled his eyes.

"You must want to change back soon as possible, right?" Raijin continued. "I mean, you prob'ly hate being defenseless, ya know." The large guy's face darkened and he futilely tried to hide it from Zell. "An' you must really hate being stuck with me."

The last sentence was mumbled, and seemed to be more of an admission of low self-esteem than an insight into Zell's feelings. Despite his black mood, Zell was moved to reassure the man. Raijin had taken very good care of him, figured out his identity, and—though several days ago Zell never would have believed he'd be admitting this even to himself—he was, despite appearances, a good guy.

Zell mewed to get the man's attention, then deliberately purred and butted his head against Raijin's chest.

Four minutes later they were standing at Quistis' dormitory door, Zell having directed Raijin with discreet claw extensions—right for 'right' and left for 'left'—that gently pressed against skin.

The martial artist-turned-cat found the concept of him 'riding' and 'steering' the large staff fighter quite amusing.

"Yes…?" Quisy's inquisitive answer trailed off in puzzlement as the opening door revealed an unexpected caller.

Raijin looked at the floor and shuffled his feet. "Um. Zell wanted to see you." He thrust the kitten towards the woman. Zell pawed the air in alarm; the only keeping him from a very long drop to the floor were the four fingers under his belly.

Quistis reluctantly and awkwardly took the cat. "This is nonsense!" She huffed.

Zell mewed and looked back at Raijin. He was surprised to find himself uneasy in his good friend's hold; he missed the security of Raijin's arms. This thought came at Zell from left field and he knew he'd be blushing if his face wasn't furry.

Raijin refused to accept the cat. He crossed his arms and tried to think of some way to prove that the cat was Zell. It took him a couple moments to remember what the Headmistress had said before; the panicky glances he was getting from Kitty-Zell kept distracting him with guilt.

He finally came up with something. "Try to draw, ya know!" He suggested triumphantly.

Quistis rolled her eyes and did so just to placate the brutish idiot. Only to find that Quetzalcoatl was indeed Junctioned to an immature feline!

"What?! I don't understand!" The woman thoughtlessly and accidentally dropped the cat.

Unfortunately for Zell, his built-in feline instincts didn't include the well-known cats-always-land-on-their-feet ability. He howled when he hit the floor, though mostly from shock.

Raijin immediately picked him up and cuddled him, the offense of dropping a helpless kitty apparently grave enough for him to glare at the scary whip-lady.

"I'm sorry! I didn't mean to drop him!" Quistis gasped in apology.

Zell's caretaker stopped his accusing glare and held him up to eye-level. "You okay, Zell?"

Zell felt something inside him melt at the worried expression in those brown eyes. All he could do was lick the man's nose and purr.

Quistis was unbalanced by the seemingly affirmative response to Raijin's inquiry. "Well, why don't you leave Zell with me and I'll call a meeting to try to figure out what happened and how to change him back?" She extended her arms expectantly.

Raijin looked at her hands then back at Zell, frowning. "I don't think so, Miss Trepe. Zell has been happy with me, ya know. You have your meeting and come see us when you're done."

Raijin left the stunned woman and walked down the hall. Zell was surprised at the usually compliant man's refusal to follow orders. Relieved, though. Again, Zell noted the unexpected preference to stay with Raijin instead of Quisty. Now, the thought was joined with the realization that what the dark man had said was true: Zell had been happy with Raijin. Still was happy, according to the unconscious purring that rumbled in his throat and chest. Happier, in fact, than he'd been the past several months.

--

That night Raijin sprawled on the bed, Zell in the narrow space between the muscular body and the wall. Instead of feeling penned in, he felt… safe.

"I hope your friends figure out how to turn you back, ya know," Raijin offered. Zell watched as the man bit his lip and looked at the ceiling. "But… I'll miss you. Even though, ya know, you aren't yourself. It was nice to not be alone."

The marmalade-colored kitten studied Raijin's face. Hyne, the big guy looked so _sad_. Zell tried to put as much comfort into a meow as he could.

"Bet you can't wait 'til you're human again. So you can be with your friends. Ya know?"

_Man_, Zell thought. Where was this guilt coming from? Of course he wanted to hang out with Selphie and Squall and Quisty! Though… everyone had been too busy lately to actually hang out…. And the only people who actually seemed interested in talking to him in the past several months were his students and Seifer. (Almasy's attention, though, he would be happy to do without.)

"Maybe…" Raijin's eyes flicked to meet Zell's before darting away again, "maybe we can hang out sometime? Just, ya know, hang out?" His voice was so hopeful, yet his body language clearly expected a negative answer from Zell. His vulnerability got to Zell and the martial arts instructor felt a wave of kindness and compassion toward the man who had unreservedly taken him in.

Zell rolled on his back, his right side pressing close to Raijin, and purred in response.


	5. The Fifth Day

The Fifth Day

The next morning was like the handful of others Zell had experienced as a "guest" of Raijin's: the large man got out of bed, pissed (except today he carefully closed the bathroom door out of modesty), pulled on clothes, scooped a large handful of treats into Zell's bowl, gave him an abbreviated petting, and departed to eat breakfast in the cafeteria.

Zell lolled in bed for awhile before doing his business in the pile of newspapers on the floor next to the toilet (_that_ had taken some getting used to!) and chomped down his breakfast. After eating, he spent some time batting around a toy mouse Raijin's gran had sent (something he only did when he was alone, because that simple activity was embarrassingly diverting).

He heard voices and a knock on the door. Afraid that it was Seifer here to bully him, he hid under the bed until Quistis' voice clearly said, "Raijin? We have an idea of how to change Zell back."

Zell's heartbeat sped up in excitement, but he stayed crouched under the bed. He hoped Raijin got back soon.

"Must be at breakfast." Zell recognized Squall's voice through the closed door.

"I guess so," Quistis sighed. "You want to use your override code, Squall?"

Zell heard the keypad being used and the door slid open. He pressed himself into the corner and watched his friends' feet enter the room, unaccountably scared.

Quistis called his name and Zell kept still as Squall's boots paced around.

"Guess Zell isn't here," Squall said. "Who do you think that is?" The gunblade artist mused.

"Raijin's only living relative is his maternal grandmother," Quistis stated. Zell surmised that they were looking at the picture of Raijin's gran. "What do you think these rocks are here for?"

"Maybe Raijin has an academic interest in geology?" Squall offered. They both snickered. Zell felt his hackles rise: he couldn't believe his friends were standing there cracking jokes about the only person who had gladly taken care of him when he was helpless! He bared his needle sharp kitten teeth but stifled the hiss that wanted to emerge-he didn't want to expose himself to either of them without the comforting presence of Raijin.

"I looked into his SeeD file," Quistis casually mentioned, "and Raijin failed a significant number of preliminary exams. Cid must have taken pity on him, accepting him into SeeD with such low academic scores. His practical exam marks weren't anything special."

"The guy hasn't been on very many missions," Squall agreed. "But can you imagine him living on his own? The big lug is all brawn and no brain. Cid's doing him a favor, letting him stay with SeeD."

Zell couldn't believe his pointy, fur-covered ears. His friends--the two he'd least expect it from, no less!—were gossiping and cruelly cutting somebody up behind his back! He felt hot, righteous anger boil in his belly. _How dare they!_ How _dare_ they just waltz into Raijin's dorm room and poke through his personal belongings and make mean jokes about his difficulties?!

"So, you think this will actually work?"

Quistis sighed. "I don't know. Probably not. Kadowaki couldn't think of anything. Xu is running diagnostics on that collar, but nothing's been conclusive. Except…." She trailed off.

"Except what? What are you smiling about?" Squall inquired.

"We searched his room and found the receipt for that collar he picked up in Timber. Came from a pet shop." Despite Squall's remark, Zell didn't detect any mirth in Quisty's voice. His ears flattened in shame. What was Squall going to think?

"I wondered where he'd gotten it." Despite himself, Zell was disappointed in the Commander's neutral response. "Oh. Did Nida tell you that he found gay porn in Zell's room?"

_Okay_, Zell thought humorlessly, _mortification level increasing_.

Quistis' reply was mild. "No. You knew he was gay, though, right?"

"I'd heard rumors," Squall admitted. "Though considering the source was Seifer, I didn't give them any credit. Hey, wait. Do you think the fact that it was a pet collar had anything to do with Zell becoming a cat?"

Zell was relieved that they were back on the important topic.

"Xu's guess is that the Pet House Zell took interacted with the collar. No one's figured out why, though."

The sound of the door sliding open captured the three SeeDs' attention. Zell saw Raijin's big battered sneakers in the opening.

"What are ya doin' here, ya know?"

Quistis smoothed her skirt. "Waiting for you. We have something to try to change Zell back. Where is he?"

"Around here someplace," Raijin replied. A note of worry crept into his voice. "Unless Seif-"

"Almasy's on a mission," Squall informed him coolly.

Raijin grunted in relief. "Zell?" He called.

Zell crept out from under the bed. He noticed Quistis' blush and Squall's uncomfortable expression and glared at them as Raijin scooped him up.

"They've got somethin' to try, ya know," Raijin informed Zell. Zell cocked his head and gave him his best attempt at a "No, duh?" look.

"Here." Quistis held out a Potion.

From Zell's vantage point in Raijin's arms, he looked scornfully at the item and back up at Quistis. _This_ was their best guess at a cure? All that the greatest minds of Balamb Garden could come up with was a _Potion_? Not even a Remedy?

Quistis wiggled the bottle at Raijin. "Give it to him."

Zell watched Raijin's thick fingers take the vial. He squirmed, and the man placed him on the bed. The staff fighter uncorked the bottle and held it toward Zell. Giving Quistis and Squall what he hoped was a long-suffering look, he licked at the liquid.

Next thing he knew he was lying on the bed: two arms, two legs, no whiskers or tail, but a whole lotta skin.

"Geez!" Zell dove under the covers. He glared at his two friends. "You didn't warn me I'd come back _naked_!"

"We-we didn't think it would actually _work_," Quistis stuttered.

Squall pulled himself away from the wall he'd been leaning on. "Looks like everything's back to normal. Time to get to work." The brunet nodded once then exited.

Quistis uncrossed her arms. "Indeed. Zell, you have the day off from your usual duties. Tomorrow's Thursday, and your classes will resume then. Natalia's been taking over while you were… indisposed." She lifted an eyebrow. "And Raijin… Thanks for taking care of him." Then she, too, left.

Zell and Raijin were left alone, the former naked in the latter's bed.

"Uh…" Zell looked studiously at the navy comforter. _Major blushing going on_. Even his ears burned. He chanced a glance up at brown eyes. "You have anything I can borrow? To wear?"

Raijin, it turned out, was just as red under his dark complexion. He nodded comically fast. "Yeah. Prob'ly be too big, ya know, but…." He turned to root through the contents of his footlocker. "Here." A red t-shirt and denim shorts were bunched in a meaty fist that was thrust towards the martial artist.

"Thanks," Zell replied uncomfortably, unfolding the garments. The t-shirt had a cartoon chocobo and the legend "ChocoFarm" screen printed on the front. Zell had last been to ChocoFarm about eleven years ago, but this shirt looked brand new. "Um, do you think I could have some privacy?"

"Y-yeah!" Raijin stumbled backward toward the bathroom. "No problem!" The additional "ya know" was muffled behind the closed door.

Zell stifled a grin and got dressed. He spread his arms to look down at the effect then dropped them. "'m decent!" He called, and Raijin emerged, red-faced.

"Little big," the man rumbled.

"Understatement," Zell replied, rolling his eyes. But he smiled at the amusing image he must he knew he made with Raijin's huge clothes hanging off his body. He lifted a hand to scratch his head then moaned. "Crap! My hair's a mess!"

"You look cute," Raijin blurted. The large man immediately cringed back, patently embarrassed. "I-I mean-"

"Thanks," Zell said kindly, amused at the shyness and uncertainty the intimidating man exuded. "And, you know, thanks, too, for taking care of me while I was-" he trailed off, unsure of what to say and also bemused that he seemed to have picked up Raijin's self-effacing tag line.

"No problem." The words were said softly and seemed to be directed at the carpet.

Zell was rarin' to leave and take a shower and scarf down some hot dogs, but something seemed to be pulling him back. "Hey, Raij. D'ya wanna, like, hang out sometime?"

Raijin lifted his head, staring at Zell doubtfully. "Really?"

Zell watched a sparkle grow in brown eyes as he nodded. "Definitely."

"Yeah!" A hesitant smile stretched across the man's face.

"Alright. Cool. I'll, uh, see you around." Zell took a couple steps toward the door, watching Raijin nod happily.

"Yeah!" The large man said again.

Zell opened the door and lifted a hand in farewell.

--

Zell whistled as he gelled up his spikes. The shower had been nice, and the relief of beating off had been much-needed. Now it was time to get to the cafeteria and have some human food!

Luck was with him, and he managed to get a plateful of hot dogs. He looked around the cafeteria and saw Selphie waving madly at him. Grinning, he took a seat with her and Irvine. "Hey guys!"

"Zelly! How was your mission?" Selphie enthused.

"Mith-in?" Zell inquired, mouth full. His eyes oscillated between her and the cowboy.

"You've been gone for several days," Irvine drawled. "Heard it had somethin' to with cats in a forest or somethin'." There was a gleam in his eye that informed Zell that Irvine knew what had happened.

"_Kitties_?!" Selphie squealed. "You got to see kitties? Were they cute and fuzzy? Or were they wild and dangerous?"

Zell glanced back at Irvine and saw the corner of his mouth quirk. "Y'know how my Seffie is with cute things. When she was pokin' around lookin' for you, Squall told her about your _mission_."

Irvine's hinting clued Zell in, and he was immediately grateful that his friends hadn't told Selphie he'd been turned into a kitten. He had the idea that she would've been like Seifer with the doll dresses, but worse. With tea parties. And cooing. And affectionate but careless squeezing. He loved Selphie, but shuddered at the thought of what it would have been like if she had gotten her mitts on him as a cat.

"Oh! My _mission_ was fine." He winked conspiratorially at Irvine. The redhead rolled his eyes and shook his head.

"You have the subtlety for a undercover mission, _that's_ for sure," the cowboy muttered facetiously.

Selphie picked that up. "Undercover? Were you in a cat costume?! Ohmygosh, I bet you were _adorable_!"

"No! I mean, of course not. That'd be stupid!"

Selphie's lip quivered. Irvine cut in to do some damage control. "Hun, you couldn't fool a cat with a costume. And Squall told me that there was an issue with illegal poaching of wildcats 'round Deling," he lied. "That's prolly what Zell was doin'."

Zell had taken the opportunity to cram his mouth with food, so when Selphie looked at him he just shrugged one shoulder in sketchy confirmation.

"Anyway, we've gotta go, sunshine. You've gotta class soon." Irvine wrapped an arm around his girlfriend's shoulders and pulled her to her feet. "We'll see ya later."

"Bye Zell!" Selphie chirped, back to her usual cheerful self. Zell saluted her and she giggled and let Irvine lead her toward the exit.

Zell concentrated on enjoying his food and listened vaguely to the chattering of SeeDs and cadets that echoed off the walls.

"-ell!" he heard. Looking around he saw Raijin in the food line pointing at him. Zell smiled and waved, and saw Raijin's face light up at the acknowledgement. The man waved back enthusiastically. Zell watched as Fujin kicked him in the shin and said something. He couldn't hear it, but it was obviously something mean because Raijin's smile dropped and his entire large frame seemed to droop and he looked away.

Fujin was _such_ a bully! Zell huffed, angry on Raijin's behalf. It wasn't just Seifer; both of Raijin's "friends" were no such thing, and the large staff fighter put up with the insults and abuse because he thought that otherwise he'd be alone.

Zell felt guilty. He'd never made any kind overtures to Raijin. And now he knew that his own friends were just as bad: judgmental and scornful and petty. The sad truth was that Raijin would probably be lonely if he didn't have the questionable companionship of the DC.

Well, he'd just have to try and help! Zell owed Raijin, and besides that he wanted to. He'd gotten to understand the staff fighter during the last five days, even if it hadn't been by choice. And, unexpectedly, Zell admired him as well as pitied him. The guy was slow, which was unfortunate, but he had a sweet nature. Zell's mouth twisted in irony: never before would he have used the term "sweet" in relation with Raijin. But he was. And Zell had been affected by that sweetness. How Raijin had rescued him, protected him; the times he'd picked up on Zell's anxiety and soothed it with a word or strokes of a calloused palm. How he'd known exactly the right places to tickle or scratch….


	6. The Wanting

Warning: male horniness and self-pleasure.

The Wanting

Zell felt his cock twitch and looked around, horrified. He'd been sitting in the middle of the caf _daydreaming_ about _Raijin_ petting him! And it had turned him on! In the middle of the cafeteria! It didn't seem like anyone had noticed, but still…. Zell scurried to dump his tray and bolted to his dorm.

"Hyne!" Zell panted, once he was safely in his apartment. "I totally have a thing for _Raijin_!" The realization was undeniable. Strangely, it was also, somehow, _right_. He'd always been attracted to big muscley guys and, hell, Raijin was one of the biggest men in Garden. But he was kind, and vulnerable, and-

-had a _huge_ cock. Zell found himself grinning at the memory. _Another thing to put in the "pro" column._

He was horny. He'd masturbated in the shower not too long ago, but that had been accompanied by vague fantasies and was impelled mostly by physical feedback; his body had just needed release.

Now he was hot, hard, and aching because of _Raijin_. And he was okay with it. Hell; it wasn't like he had to angst over "does he like me in that way or not?" because he'd witnessed Raijin watching porn and heard the guy admit that he found Zell attractive.

"Gods," Zell mumbled, shoving his hand down his shorts. His fingers wrapped around his leaking erection and his eyes rolled back in his head. He squeezed, and his knees buckled and he slid to the floor. No matter. He spread his legs, yanked off his jeans, and gave himself room. Fisting himself wasn't enough; he sucked on his fingers and slid them in the back, imagining he was preparing himself, opening himself for Raijin's massive cock.

Two fingers weren't enough, so a third joined in. Zell climbed on his knees, right hand on his rod, left awkwardly stretched around to his ass. "Yess," he hissed, right thumb rubbing the head and swirling the liquid around. It was almost too much, and his spine stiffened. Not ready to end the fantasy yet, Zell dug his fingertips into skin and stopped himself from coming. "Need more," he panted, fumbling to his feet and stumbling to his nightstand.

Imaginary Raijin watched as Zell smeared lube around all four fingers of his left hand. He'd never attempted four; just index, ring, and pinky. Zell waited until the urge to orgasm receded and studied his hand. He didn't think that his four fingers were as wide as Raijin's cock would be, but he wasn't going to attempt to add a thumb and injure himself. _No_, he thought with a shaky grin, he'd have to wait until _Raijin_ opened him to get that wide.

Finally back under control, Zell penetrated himself again. It burned slightly, but he imagined Raijin: pictured the big man's happy face and added the sparkle of lust he had seen in the man's expression as he watched the Zell look-alike on the vid. "Raijin-" he heard himself whimper, and he smiled. Hyne, this was hot. His stubby fingers were too short to actually hit his prostate, but he could feel his insides twitching in pleasure anyway. He jacked his cock, felt the wave of release threaten, then rode the crest and plunged into the greatest orgasm in his life, unaware that he mindlessly mewed as he came.

It took a couple of minutes to return to himself and he found that he was sprawled on the floor panting. "Hyne in a handbasket," he muttered, grinning moronically and shakily propping himself up. The discovery of the mess he had to clean up didn't affect the altitude of his high.

--

While Zell was bringing himself off in his dorm, Raijin was moping in his. He had been happy when Zell had smiled and waved to him in the cafeteria, until Fujin's kick and whisper of "He'll never really like you. You're just a big dummy."

Raijin knew he was a big dummy. Huge and slow and stupid and ugly. Zell was short and small, quick and clever. Yellow hair and big blue eyes and shiny white teeth. Raijin had secretly watched Zell teach, and had admired how strong he was and how fast. He saw Zell stop and smile and slow down to make sure a struggling student learned.

Raijin remembered a snatch of conversation he'd overheard: a tall girl tearfully protest that she was too big and clumsy to take Zell's class.

Zell had hugged her sideways, his arm unable to rest on her shoulders so he'd just grabbed her bicep and squeezed. The top of his head barely reached her nose. "Never think you're too big or clumsy. You're tall, but that's an advantage in a hand-to-hand fight! I guarantee you'll almost always have a better reach than your opponent. The clumsiness will go away with practice. It may take a little more work, but, hey, that's okay. You really wanna learn to fight and I'm gonna teach you! Your body is perfect the way it is; we can adapt movements and techniques to give you your own unique fighting style. Difficulty is just an opportunity."

Raijin had nearly cried himself when the student's tears stopped and a look of relief and anticipation settled on her face. "You're right! I can do this!" She'd been so happy, and Zell had smiled so hugely.

Was there anything in him that Zell would see as opportunity? Anything of perfection in his giant frame and thick skull? He didn't think so. He had always been big, dumb Raijin. Even Gran had always called him her "strong young man." He supposed that her observations that he had "a kind spirit" was good, but how impressive is that? He wanted to be liked. He wanted to be sexy. He wasn't exactly sure what "sexy" meant, but he'd heard girls use to describe Zell and the big guy in Raijin's favorite porno called the Zell-guy that, and it seemed to fit.

Zell was cute along with having that nebulous quality of "sexy." Raijin knew cute: babies were cute, and kitties were cute, and Zell-Kitty had been cute, and Zell wearing his too-big clothes had been cute. Blushing Zell, naked in his bed, was cute, though Raijin had wished he had gotten a better look at naked Zell. He was sure Naked Zell would be cute, too.

Raijin knew he loved Zell. Gran had explained that when a boy's penis got big, it meant you loved somebody. Seifer had laughed when Raijin had said that, handed him some gil, and left Raijin in a vid shop with lots of pictures of naked people. Raijin found one that reminded him of Zell and had bought it. When he watched it for the first time he finally understood what boys did with their penises. He tried some stuff and it felt good. Raijin wanted to try the rest of the stuff with Zell. Not the fighting part of it, but the part with weird noises and kissing and touching. Fucking.

Seifer said he was sick as well as stupid if he wanted to watch a vid of two guys fucking. Fujin said that Zell wouldn't want to fuck Raijin. Raijin wanted to fuck Zell, but only if Zell wanted him to. Zell would never want him to.

Raijin stayed in his room alone. He didn't feel like watching the vid, so he looked at his magazines and wrote a letter to Gran and lifted weights and looked at his rocks. When it was time, he went and ate dinner with Seifer and Fujin. They mostly pretended Raijin wasn't there which was okay. Better than them calling him names.

Eventually it was bedtime, and Raijin brushed his hair and brushed his teeth (not with the same brush), and put on his sleeping pants. He curled up in bed, feeling lonely, missing Zell-Kitty, and finally went to sleep.

--

Notes: If anyone's interested, the REAL final chapter is posted on my LiveJournal 'cause it's full of raw, explicit sex. Without the usual prefaces, the link is: chara-ter livejournal com/15308 html (spaces need to be made into dots).


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